Processing the loss
Some helpful steps to help you process what has happened...
The more I read, the more I realised that processing my lost was foremost to the start of the grieving process. Sometimes it helped me to totally use distraction and keep myself busy with things unrelated to Mo. At other times when I felt I could cope with it, I found it helpful to work through my grief by busying myself with things related to her. It also helped me to feel close to her even though she was no longer here with me physically.
I found that doing the following things amongst others helped me process my loss. It made me feel connected to Mo, and in a way, continued our relationship, albeit down a different path. I wanted to share some of the things that have helped me in that journey, in the hope that it may help someone else. I thought it might help some of you to list some of the cathartic things that I have done in one place:
I found that doing the following things amongst others helped me process my loss. It made me feel connected to Mo, and in a way, continued our relationship, albeit down a different path. I wanted to share some of the things that have helped me in that journey, in the hope that it may help someone else. I thought it might help some of you to list some of the cathartic things that I have done in one place:
- Made a memorial table with Mojo’s ashes and special things in my bedroom
- Created a beautiful garden and wildlife area in her memory, Mojo’s memorial garden
- Planted her a special rosebush
- Had memorial plaques made to go in her special garden
- Had a slate head made in Mojo’s image (in centre photo further down page), painted by Lou. See examples of her work by clicking on the link below
https://www.etsy.com/uk/shop/Colouflower?ref=condensed_trust_header_title_items
- Collected together handmade momentos and paintings
- Collected together all Mojo’s photos, both digital and printed and put them into albums.
- Talked about her to friends, family and strangers
- Bought myself a cuddly soft toy bay pony, for which I’ve had fun making beads and a head collar for. I’ve also sewn some of Mojo’s own mane into the forelock.
- Made tassels out of her tail and mane hair
- Practiced mindfulness meditation to help calm my mind
- Collected things together and made a scrapbook
- Made cushions and throws from her old blanket
- Made a memorial wall
- Made a memorial video
- Discussed my feelings with my vet
- Had jewellery made by Helen (cremation beads containing ashes, tail, mane and body hair, see photo on left further down page) and then wore it on a necklace and Pandora bracelet. For examples of Helen’s work, please click on the link below.
https://www.etsy.com/uk/shop/helenlouisejewellery?ref=l2-shopheader-name
- Talked to her aloud and in my head
- Screamed and cried loudly in her garden
- Wrote tributes to her in different forums and groups
- Made online friends through pet loss forums and groups
- Wrote letters to her
- Used forums to talk about my loss and the awful feelings that came with it
- Created a website in her memory
- Decorated and remodelled the inside of her stable into a beautiful retreat/studio
- Lit a special candle
- Had a special solar light made by Kate, for Mojo’s memorial garden. For examples of Kate’s work, please click on the link below.
- Contacted the Blue Cross Animal Bereavement Service. This is a free service in the UK. You can use the service via phone or email.
Beautiful sympathy cards
Cuddlies and cushions
Cards I made for Mo
Memorial jewellery made with Mo’s ashes and hair
Memorial wall, trinkits and ashes
Mojo’s memorial garden
