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In Memory Of Little Mo 


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Anniversaries and Holidays

Managing Anniversaries

I soon learnt that the hardest things to manage, are the anniversaries, the memorable dates that are triggers for emotion, Christmas and birthdays. 
The first ones were extremely difficult and by far, the worst. The first Christmas, the first birthday for me and the one year anniversary of Mo’s death. 

I try to make new special memories for those days, ones that celebrate the wonderful moments that Mo has given me, and that I too, have given her.

I do hope that you will enjoy reading about them and that for some of you, it may give comfort and ways to celebrate your own special and meaningful anniversaries.

Christmas

That first Christmas was terribly hard. It didn’t feel right to celebrate without Mo here. I was so lucky to have all my family about me for Christmas and for a Christmas family time, we all went to Leeds Castle. There, we walked around the beautiful Christmas market and drank a glass of punch to toast Mojo. Afterwards, we looked at the stunning room decorations and Christmas trees in the castle. Finally, we all went on a horse on the carousel and I held on tight and celebrated the love I had shared with my beloved Mo.

I have had a special wooden decoration made with Mo’s name on and I have bought a clear glass bauble in which I have put some of her mane. This year, the second Christmas without Mo here, I have put up one of my favourite Christmas photos of her. It was the day that I put her special Christmas outfit on her: Reindeer antlers, red leg wraps with bells and matching red and white fur trims to put around her halter. It still brings tears to my eyes and a lump to the back of my throat but I look at it and try to think on how lucky I have been that she came into my life. My best Christmas memory was the year that I rode her Christmas morning and then brought her into the house!

People may not understand that these days still upset us and sometimes we have no option but to just accept that’s the way some people are. We shouldn’t allow that to stop us being able to engage with our grief. I have put together a list of ideas, some my own and some from others, that might help you to remember your beloved horses at Christmas.

Ideas for commemorating your horse or beloved animals at Christmastime

  • Display a favourite Christmas photo in a festive frame
  • Write down some special Christmas memories
  • Make a donation in memory of your beloved horse and send it in a Christmas card. Put a photo of your horse on the front.
  • Write a Christmas card, poem or letter to your horse
  • Light a Christmas candle candle
  • Decorate a Christmas wreath and place it at the yard or a special place 
  • Make a Christmas memorial table
  • Buy or make a personalised Christmas ornament for your horse
  • Say a special prayer
  • Tie a ribbon on your Christmas tree in the special colour you used for your horse


My Birthday

I didn’t want to celebrate my birthday very much that first year. My husband took me for an Alpaca Trek on that day however, and it turned out to be very lovely. It was really relaxing and enjoyable to pet, feed and walk the alpacas!

Six Months

On the six month anniversary of Mojo’s death, I published this website it was the one thing, out of everything that I did that really, really helped me. By putting her website link on various groups and forums, I hope to create a lasting legacy. I would also like to think that our story can help other horse owners too, who have lost their beloved equines and give them some comfort in their loss.     

I am constantly adding to her website and updating it with the lovely comments from people who have read it. I’ve also seen a website that shows you how to use images from the past and bring them into the here and now. It’s a way for me to keep Mo’s memory alive.   

One Year

It’s hard to believe that it’s been a whole year since my darling Mo died. Some days it seems like only yesterday, yet other days it feels like years and years have passed. Feelings come and go and change rapidly like the wind. I’m getting used to a sudden surge of grief that appears from nowhere unexpectedly.  

I am so thankful for the new friends that I have made on different forums and Facebook groups. It is their understanding of going through similar circumstances that has helped me to get through these past 12 months along with the continuous support of my everloving husband. 

I can honestly say that I still miss Mo every single day. I am lucky that I have a wonderful little dog who has given me focus along with a new hobby which is that I have taken up cycling.

I knew that today would be a hard day, the really difficult memories would come flooding back, and they did. Memories of that night and the emptiness that followed. I wanted to make it a positive day, a day that would signify all the wonderful things that Mo had brought into my life. How she taught me to live in the moment and live life to the full, to look at life from a different aspect and to consider the world from the horse’s point of view. Most of all, she filled my life with happiness...... 

I had a most wonderful morning spent with Smirti, who runs Little Warden, in Brasted, Kent, a non profit organisation supporting rescue ponies from Pukka Ponies Equine Rescue, a small rescue charity in Kent. Sarah from Pukka Ponies Equine Rescue had very kindly arranged for me to visit after I had contacted her. Please click the links for the Pukka Pony website, they warmly receive donations and have a number of equines for rehoming. 

http://www.pukkaponies.org.uk/

There I met two adorable ponies, Pumba and Silver. I spent time grooming and stroking them both and found out a lot about the charity and the work that Smirti and her family carry out at Little Warden. Smirti, the lady fostering the ponies, is a very kind lady who clearly has her heart set in helping the ponies on their way to enjoying life to the full and finding them new homes. She is also totally committed to educating adults and children in how to treat and understand ponies and horses. Smirti also holds many fund raising events and her website is well worth a visit. The ponies themselves, are absolutely gorgeous. Silver, a stunning grey with a most amazing beautiful face and gentle expression of the eye is a sight to behold whilst Pumba with his cheekiness, mind blowing markings and pure lovingness, if indeed that’s a word, would be adored by both adults and children alike. If I had been looking for a pony to take home, he would have definitely fitted the bill. 

It was such a relaxing morning, I just don’t know where the time went. Standing in the field with the ponies gave me such a feeling of warmth and sense of peace that I knew that this had been the best thing I could have done with my day and that Mo would be watching me. I came away feeling very calm and I hope that my beautiful Mo could see how worthwhile a donation will be in her memory to this wonderful charity. If only everyone who owned a horse or pony were as committed and caring as these charities, then the world would be a much better place. We will be sending off our donation in the post along with a lovely handmade card. Please click the link below to find out more about Smirti’s wonderful organisation.

https://www.littlewarden.org/

On our way home, we stopped at Sissinghurst Castle. We went for a look round the beautiful gardens and came across a lone dried up agapanthus. To most, this wouldn’t seem strange, but to me, it was amazing. I had commissioned a lady to make a copper solar light for Mojo’s garden, the light is based on an agapanthus, from the castle so it was lovely to find one lone plant there. We walked into the centre of the gardens and were greeted by the most beautiful big fluffy robin who stood inches away from our feet, what a wonderful visit.

Our last stop was at Tenterden where we roamed the pretty high street and then went on to the beautiful church of St Mildred’s. There, I lit a candle in remembrance of my beautiful Mo and wrote a prayer for her which is read during the evening service. It’s a lovely peaceful church and we often pop in and have a wonder around.

Last trip was our return home where we found Mojo’s new solar light flashing and glowing happily in her garden. We lit all the candles in her stable plus the Mojo Mohito candle that I had saved for the anniversary. We then opened a bottle of bubbly and said cheers to our Mojo. We reminisced some of the funny times we had shared with her and of course I had a good cry over the years I wished I could still share with her.

For the link to Craftin3d who made Mojo’s solar light, please click below.

https://m.facebook.com/CraftIn3D/ 

The Anniversary of The Morning After...

The following morning after Mojo died will always be a day that also tugs my heartstrings as it was the day that Mo finally left our house and the first one in which I awoke to find myself without her. I chose to go to the end of the garden, the route which was used on that day and I blew some bubbles to celebrate the wonderful times we had shared. We then drove to Kearnsey Abbey and took a short walk around the pond. Then we sat in the same spot that we had sat when we went there on the morning after Mo died and had seen the amazing rainbow. No rainbows this time but a clear blue sky and some beautiful swans and cygnets that made my day.

All in all, it was a lovely day and a meaningful morning that followed. Some wonderful memories were shared of a truly wonderful pony........

I will love you always Mo.

Xx

There is life after losing a beloved horse or pony but there is no quick fix. For those of you who may be suffering a similar loss, my heart goes out to you. May you find peace in the memories you share of your beloved equines.... xx