What you can do before and during the loss
What you can do if you get the chance
Here is a wonderful list of suggestions from Roma Konyk Hanson (fb), who says, ‘not everyone needs these little rituals, and sometimes it’s not possible. I’ve found these things to be helpful for myself. Take what you need. Give yourself ample time to grieve’
- If you have time before, write a letter to your horse and place it with them after.
- Reach out for help to other horse people.
- Stay with your horse for the end if you can, and don’t beat yourself up if you can’t be there.
- Tell your horse how much you love them, thank them for all the gifts you received from them. They know and are comforted by your voice. Use it gently.
- If you are fortunate enough to have your horse buried, put some things in the grave with them. You might include:Their blanket to lie on, a piece of jewellery or clothing that you often wear, photos of you and your horse, a letter to your horse, a lock of your own hair (nice trade for keeping some mane or tail).
- If you have not been able to put things with your horse at the time of burial, you could bury them at the gravesite at a later date, or possibly put them inside the casket containing the ashes or just put them nearby.
- Record the sound of a nicker or neigh
- Have some professional photos done
- Cut a lock of hair, tail or mane long before the time comes If you can
Get some counselling. There is a service offered in the UK by the BHS. It is called Friends at the End. It offers support to those making a difficult decision and a volunteer can even be with the owner when the time comes or with the horse if the owner feels unable. Please click on the link below to find out more.